It was a good news and bad news week here. I got Monday off so YEEHAW! That'll be the last holiday for quite a long stretch. I'll be working my full 30 hours of teaching every week until late summer. I really don't think I'll make it because not only am I ready to just walk away from this job, (I genuinely feel that way about once every shift), now the heat and mosquitos are cranking the stress up just a wee bit more. I hate summer in Korea with the white hot intensity of a thousand suns. And things are made no easier when the air conditioner at work is on the blink, the dogs in the hood won't let you sleep, the kids are being their usual selves even after parents were called and informed of their unconscionable behaviour in my classes, and, wouldn't you know it, now that I've started FINALLY hitting that hill behind my place the way I had planned to since coming here, I am sick yet again! For a while I wondered about the cause and effect here. Was I getting sick due to lack of exercise, or was I not exercising because I'm always sick? I liked to think the latter, of course, but now I'm sure of it! I've started hiking at least three times a week. This has gone on now for a month. I have a route that I call the Tiger Loop. There's a place at the half way turn-around called Horangi Heondol, or Tiger Rock. I read the legend in Korean but didn't know what it meant. All I could put together was the name. No worries. It's about an hour long hike. The beginning is straight uphill and gets the lungs cleaned out, then it's up and down at a pace that I like. I will soon be jogging it I think. (But not the beginning.) Last time I did it, yesterday, my time was about 45 minutes. Nice sweat! I just said, "Screw the cold, or whatever the frig it is!" and went for it. I am sick, but I'm also sick of my body telling me what to do. No way, I, III am in charge here! And it's not a coughing cold so I didn't do too badly. It's a sinus and chest congestion cold and with the blood flowing and body temp up I blasted off some productive snot rockets! I'll do it again tomorrow.
I've shared pictures before on this blog. I thought the hill was called Dong San, or "Shit Mountain," but I don't think it is. Tiger Loop sounds much better. It has a lot of paths to it so I like that. I have explored several others and don't feel confident yet that I could find them all again if I tried. But it's getting my lazy arse out of the house in the morning. I love the smell more than anything! The pine is always there but there are various flowers blooming that add to the aroma. It's better than breathing in the moldy apartment air.
So, I went on Monday, the day off, despite feeling the onset of a cold. I had hiked the Saturday AND the Sunday of the weekend! The Sunday was about a 3 hour walk all over some places I wanted to see in Gangneung.
In order of appearance are the bridge to the aquarium and the futuristic eco-friendly park and facility where some meetings will be held during the Olympics in 2018. It looks like its funding has run out. Half finished projects, abandoned facilities and unkempt grounds. But it was a nice walk. Then right across the bridge from it was the home of not one, but TWO of the people who appear on Korean currency! Lee Yi is one. He's on the 5000 won note. A scholar, poet, philosopher and social reformer. His Mother, Shin Saimdang, is on the new Korean 50,000 won note. That's about a 50 and Lee Yi is on the equivalent to a fiver. She was a noted poet, artist, painter, embroiderer and calligraphist.
What I saw was exactly what I was hoping for! Nothing special. Except the gnarly old tree and the flowers. They didn't have a house that shouted, "HEY look at how awesome I am!" The Korean people could sure learn a LOT from a little visit to this place!
The other two pics were from one of the many offshoots on my path. Again, I think I posted a pic of this before here. But it wasn't quite finished back then. The pagoda is now finished. Here's a pic and the legend, in Korean and English for you. Nice, eh? Like I said, this place has some real beauty to it. And here's a pic of the fields I mentioned on the way to E-Mart with the mile of rose covered fence or so.
Today was fertilizer day so those fields, in the sweltering heat, didn't smell nearly as good as they did on the day I took this blurry pic! But I don't mind the smell of manure. There are far worse smells walking in any Korean city on a hot day, lemme tell you!
So anyway, on my hike Monday, I started off with the big hill and was still breathing heavily when I got to the first exercise stop. There are benches and exercise machines all along these trails for doing pull-ups, push-ups, bench press, sit-ups, and several exercises people just make up. lol. They even have walking machines. I can't tell you how often I've been hiking and seen walking machines on the hiking trails. What is up with that? Thing is, they're used! I just don't get that! But I just like to get the chest all warmed up and stretched out to begin the hike. As I've mentioned before, I have some chest congestion that started when I got here. I have had it before in Korea and really think it has to do with the black mold. But I'm not sure. I keep hoping that I'll get all sweaty and hot and just cough up a big clog and it'll be all cleared up. Hasn't happened yet. And on THIS day it was something far less positive. I stretched the pecs and got into my first set of 30 push-ups. I do the same at three other stations along the Tiger Loop. I don't remember how many I had reached but I had to stop because of a MASSIVE headache! When you have the worst headache of your life at my age, it's not a good thing. I stopped, sat on the bench, took off my hiking hat and grabbed my head for about 3 or 4 minutes until it stopped throbbing. For a while I thought I was going to pass out. I didn't envy the poor dudes who would have to heave my hulking corpse off the mountain either. I was seriously thinking that for a couple of minutes! Scary as shit!
But the pain almost totally went away as my heartrate levelled out. So I kept right on hiking counting this as just another symptom of long term lethargy. I DO still think it is. I've had this sinus junk floating around my head too. When I sleep it blocks the nostril of the side I'm sleeping on. Again, making it harder to sleep and adding to the whole out of shape, sick, tired or just lazy mystery. I think the last time I had really pushed the old mortal coil to work so hard was quite some time ago and the shock shook loose some of the sinus fluid. That's my unprofessional medical opinion. But on Monday I wasn't so sure. I made a point of taking it easy on the rest of the hike although I DID do some more push-ups and didn't have another headache. But on Tuesday in preparation for the work day, I started cleaning and cooking and doing lots of last minute lesson planning and suddenly, out of nowhere the headache came back. I also had some sniffles and fever that had worsened since the day before, and was totally exhausted, so I called in sick. First time I've done that, (legitimately), in ages! I have called in sick for hangovers a few times when I was just thoroughly disgusted with the people I worked for and had all but decided to quit, but I rarely miss a day of work for a cold. This was not a cold. I still haven't ruled out the mold thing. I was told by the boss on Wednesday when I went to work still unsure I should be there, that he knows a doctor, one of my students' parents, who could check me out and I told him I'd be interested if things don't get better. But things got better when I just put my foot down and went hiking Thursday morning. Today was fine, health-wise. A nightmare otherwise.
So I am probably not treating this incident with the balls out hysteria it may warrant. Medically, that is my way since having lived with my Grandmother and learned one of the most detested words in my vocabulary: hypochondriac. I will exercise vigorously this weekend and we shall see if this, "cold" disappears or not. I hope I'm right on the edge of just flushing this sinus and chest congestion out of my system. That'd be SOOOO nice! It would make exercising easier and in turn more beneficial and soon, as I expect, I'll be jogging this little hill and blasting the muscles at the exercise stops like a champ! If not, I've got a tumor or aneurism, or Zika virus, or mold poisoning. I STILL might get checked for THAT. But I get so overworked and soul-sucked during the week, I don't want to waste any time on my weekends going to hospitals.
Which brings up today. It was a three-day week. Should have been a piece of cake! But somehow every class had been rescheduled after the holiday the way I had expected EXCEPT for the worst class I have. I was supposed to have them one time this week on Thursday. The Dementors featuring the star of the show: Frank. So you can just imagine my utter horror when on Wednesday, I dragged my sick ass into work and was half way through the day, when completely unplanned for, the Dementors encroached upon my classroom. I didn't want to look like a dummy, so I checked things out before telling them they weren't supposed to be there. Sure enough, they were. And I not only hadn't spoken a blessing over myself beforehand, but I also had no lesson planned for this class! This class that can take a never-miss lesson and render it educationally and entertainingly futile with their utter disrespect for me and their disinclination to even play a GAME if it requires any instruction! So that was what I did! I taught a lesson that had never missed in the past. I had had a long, long weekend and was able to keep my patience longer than I would have normally by Wednesday, so we got through it, but these assholes took a lesson about movies, MOVIES, and made it tedious! Not just talking about movies, mind you! No! Actually creating some quizzes for the others on movies they've seen. I gave them all very easy to follow instructions on how to describe a movie and get the other kids to guess which one it was. Fun, no?
Well, we didn't find out that day. They wasted so much time fucking around that we didn't get to the quizzing. But I didn't give up. I told them next class to bring this stuff back knowing full well the girls would and the boys wouldn't. They'd tell me they had finished and then lost the sheets I had given them to write the quizzes down on. Three movie quizzes for the other students. This is an action movie, it has Arnold Schwarzenegger in it. It's about a cyborg who goes back in time to kill the savior of the world. In the end the cyborg loses, but he's not dead...
Yeah, I know, fun, right? These little assholes did their best to make it as UNfun as they could. That was today. It was all I could do not to just kick the whole class out of class. Some of the girls were making faces, the boys were their usual selves destroying the papers I gave them and throwing them around the classroom. Using the scissors I had given them to do almost anything but what I had provided them for. One boy was trimming his arm hair, one was dangerously using his like hedge clippers and inches from other students. People were being PURPOSELY as disrespectful as possible. But I am told by the owners that this can't possibly have ANYTHING to do with racism. It's just something else that a foreigner like me can't understand. They're not fucking assholes, I just can't understand them.
At any rate, I just managed to make it through that class on the thin hope that next week I will only get them on the Thursday, which is what should have happened THIS week. But the next class was not so lucky. There's this one kid who, like many in my debate classes, has chosen the format to do nothing because it's quite easy to do so. See, if you are on a team of 6 students, chances are one of them will be good and will do the work the teacher is asking all of you to do. So you do nothing and depend on that one student to do it all for you. This is what Koreans mistakenly refer to as communal thinking. It's the exact opposite! It's incredibly selfish and entitled thinking. Or, as I call it, asshole thinking. There's this one kid, a bully, to both males and females in the class, but not the standard bully. He's a bit more interesting. He is one of the most recent students in this class, and since he's new, I hadn't noticed the influence he had until one debate day when he completely threw the whole thing. See, one of the few good students who does the work for everybody is Jane. She's a plain Jane, unfortunately for her and in this appearance manic country, the kid I'm talking about, Eun Woo, is handsome and everybody likes him because of it. They laugh at unfunny things he says, they do stupid things he suggests, and they just grin and bear unbelievable treatment from him. One debate day, Eun Woo and Jane were on the same team. The rest of the team had done diddly because they were pretty sure plain Jane would pick up the slack for them and they could just use her work to make it look like they had actually given a shit about this debate. But Eun Woo was new. He didn't know she was so integral to their debate effort. He treated her the way he would normally treat someone so inferior to himself: he just brutally dissed her and when she tried to sit with the group, said things like, "Sorry, you're too ugly to be in this group. Fuck off."
Jane was in tears and I made her come back to class but didn't make her participate in the debate. This left the team of floaters completely without any relevant debate points, since Jane was the one with them all, and the other team, (which had a couple of workers/unpopular kids), DESTROYED them! I saw what happened and made the whole losing team do a huge homework assignment as punishment for losing so badly. I recall Eun Woo telling me he had done it on his hand dictionary, IN KOREAN!!!, not written it out like all the others had. I let him go but immediately regretted it. Since then he's been as useless as a screen door on a submarine in class. He's spent the majority of his time testing out MMA moves on other male students, speaking in Korean, probably dissing girls like Jane, and making jokes that everyone laughs at. His English level is actually VERY good. One of the highest in this class. But he's too concerned about his image to contribute to class. Today, as always, he was bullying the boys. I am a boy. And I have been roughed up by aggressive males and tried to play it off as horseplay when I secretly wanted this jerk to stop. I know what the boys in this class are going through with this kid. AND the girls. Today he was applying choke holds on a couple of the boys. Something I had seen him do before and cautioned him against for the umpteenth time. Today I saw him slap on a much better, (his skills are improving), choke hold to a student who is as in need of a popular friend as anyone ever, (if you know what I mean), and his not so beautiful face went red and I saw a little bit of panic there. I told Eun Woo to knock it off. He said, "Yeah yeah." Then slapped one onto another student who went red and was gasping for air. I AGAIN told him to knock it off and was given the thing I hate the worst. The newest FEMALE student, Su Ah, does the identical thing. These two recent releases from Korean National Reform School are the only two who have tried this with me. Eun Woo, being male, and catching me on a day when I'm underslept, underenthused and under the weather, will never do this again. I said, "Do you want to try your MMA on me?" I started walking over toward him. You know how things sort of get tunnelled out of your vision when rage takes over. I think I knocked aside a couple of chairs and desks to do so. Maybe with students in them. I dunno. I reached him and he was still trying to maintain his machismo. "Yeah, yeah, yeah," he said while raising an arm as if to brush me away. I grabbed that arm, lucky for him his left, and slapped on a wrist lock. I felt and heard some snap, crackle and pops. He wasn't going to just shake this one off. I said, "How's that feeling? HUH?" He said something in surrender. Don't remember what. I kept the lock on a bit longer to drive home my point. "You will not do this again will you? WILL YOU? PROMISE?" He promised. So I let go.
This is exactly what I was talking about last post. I was worried about this happening. And now it has. I would be fired tomorrow in Canada. No ifs ands or buts about it. But this ain't Canada. In fact, I had the best class ever with this particular class. I saw Eun Woo starting to do his usual physical domination games with other students, then stop. Partially because of the promise, perhaps, and partially because his left wrist was killing him, for sure! He was quiet and well behaved. For the first time ever. He even asked me later in the class if I was angry. I told him I am a teacher. I saw that he was interested in learning some B.J.J., (Brazilian Jiu Jitsu), and now he knew some. I'm sure he'll never forget it. Unfortunately he'll probably use it on a classmate sooner or later. Hope not.
The best part about class today was that, although, as always, few were paying any attention, Jane was following closely and very attentively! Oh the others weren't goofing off as much as usual, which was very nice, but Jane paid extra special attention. I wonder why. And a few times in class Jane and Eun Woo has exchanges in Korean, but Jane seemed to mind less than usual. This was nice to see.
About half way through the class Eun Woo looked at me feeling his wrist and said nothing. I said, "Yeah that'll sting for a while. Just let me know if you'd like to learn any more moves." He was probably the only one who understood that. Except, deliciously, Jane. They are probably the best two in class. He declined my offer.
Okay, I admit to relishing this just a little bit even though I'm a giant dick for picking on a kid much smaller and weaker. But in NO way did he NOT deserve this, so I am totally justified. Thing is, my Canadian upbringing has me squirming. I would give a bit more of a crap if I had any plans to ever go back to Canada and teach, but I don't. And I think if I talked to Eun Woo's parents and explained what I had done, THEY would probably love me for it. This is Korea, and because it's still run by corrupt men, not emotional women, a guy can get away with a bit of well deserved violence like this.
Having tried to justify my actions as much as I have, I still have to get the hell out of this toxic situation! What if I do this again? I don't see classes behaving better. Just begging for rear naked chokes the whole works of them! I don't think I can have a stressless day of classes until I make every single student tap out for fuck's sake! That's just not what I signed up for!
But having said that, there are the good ones. And they're still in the majority. I'd get the hell out of this place if they weren't. Heart-warming kids who make me hold myself back from selfishly hugging them for a quick pick-me-up. Maybe I should. I think I don't because I don't want to get too emotionally invested here before I unceremoniously exit stage left. That's the plan and it has been from the beginning. I don't deny HOPING that this would be the hagwon with the heart of gold, (as rare as the whore with the heart of gold), but you just can't bank on that!
So, here's the good news, finally, I have been paid some interest by the ROK, (Republic of Korea), military. I got a response from a military academy! They are asking about me! Imagine that! Adults, which are my specialty, with discipline, which is what is lacking in my students now. If I am allowed classroom autonomy there, I'd never leave! And they'd never want me to! We're in the initial stages of things and I won't start, if accepted, until Sept. 1, but it's something! Something to give me hope. Bleak as this situation is, it's probably good experience that will help.
So I guess that's a positive note to end on. Though things are as negative, or more negative than ever. There's still a hope for positivity.
Is that a straw? Let me grasp for it...
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