July 1st here in Korea. It's not yet July 1st in Canada, but I'm already seeing posts that people are "proud" Canadians. These posts once gave me a warm feeling of tribal fealty, but I've overcome that. Now I look at them as evidence of why Canada hasn't yet become a country Canadians should be proud of. It's a country people are unconditionally proud of and that is not a good thing, it's a scary thing.
I've probably posted this before, probably on Canada Day, but it's so perfect, I'll post it again:
National pride and ethnic pride. Pride should be reserved for something you've achieved or attained on your own, not something that happens by accident of birth. Being Canadian isn't a skill. It's a fuckin' genetic accident. You wouldn't say I'm proud to be 5'11. I'm proud to have a predisposition for colon cancer. So why the fuck would you be proud to be Canadian. If you're happy about it that's fine. Do that, put that on your car. 'Happy to be Canadian.' Be happy, don't be proud. Too much pride as it is. Pride goeth before a fall. Never forget Proverbs.
The above paragraph is almost a direct quote from George Carlin. YES! George Carlin quoting the Bible! It's a gem! But it's also blatantly true. Yet every Canada Day people disregard or ignore this sense, logic and reasonableness and talk about how they're "PROUD" to be Canadian. They announce it to other Canadians... proudly. They get a Molson raised to them or clinked against their own Molson for having a common, but unsubstantiated pride. Now I'm generalizing. It could be two people who have worked and saved their whole lives, in other countries, with dreams to one day become Canadians, and they were successful through great struggle and difficulty. THAT right there is some substantiated pride in being Canadian! But for the majority of us, our fireworks popping, anthem singing and champagne toasting are but sounding brass and tinkling cymbals to use another Biblical reference. That's from 1 Corinthians 13, the "love chapter." For that reason, it bears repetition in its entirety, or at least paraphrasing. It says that a person can speak in languages of man and even angels, but if that man has no love, his words are... Sounding brass and tinkling cymbals is just a Biblical way to say "yada yada yada."
Love for Canada. I think George would agree with me when I say, I can understand that too. I love Canada. I could make a lengthy list of reasons. Clean air, good beer, beautiful scenery, the people (in general), hockey, fishing, health care, social net, education (even though it's deteriorating), multiculturalism, pushing strangers' cars when they're stuck, hitching strangers' bumpers when they're not, rye whiskey, wildlife, mountains, water, as I said, I could make a lengthy list. These are things people remind each other of every Canada Day, then falsely associate them with pride. Love, happiness, fine. Pride, no.
Another lengthy list I could make is a list of things NOT to be proud of. The most obvious is the unmarked graves of all those native kids at residential schools. Also the way an inferior culture of greed, violence and inequality forced itself onto a far superior culture when the Indigenous people of Canada were overwhelmed by the Europeans. Not something to be proud of. I believe I linked this very same article in my blogpost on Canada's 150th birthday.
The way Canada's government levied a small, temporary tax on Canadians intended to help the war effort and has continued collecting and increasing it for over 100 years. You know those places where you go to eat and they don't demand a tip, but you know they expect it? Or those shows that don't list a price, but are "by donation?" That's Canada's income tax. For a century!
Generosity exploited to the absolute maximum. Like the indigenous beliefs in sharing everything and owning nothing. Let's just take it all!!! Not a source of pride.
Our standing as preferred trading partners with China, a country that practices genocide and has detained at least 13 Canadians on trumped up charges as revenge for Canada obeying US extradition law in regards to Meng Wanzhou who violated sanctions against Iran and stole trade secrets for Huawei, her Daddy's company. Canada won't use Huawei for 5G (good), but can't overtly say so for fear of losing its share of the huge Chinese market and that sweet, sweet Chinese slave labour. (bad)
There hasn't been a candidate worthy of my vote in Canada in my lifetime and the "democracy" that may have once existed, is hanging by a thread. I could go on with this list too, but I won't. I'll just feel angry, sad and I won't like any of these things, but I'm not going to feel ashamed of them.
Here's something I saw posted on Facebook today. Do you see the clever rhetoric? First of all, if the bad moments far outnumber the good moments, then, YES, we should define Canada by them. This is that hyperpositivity, the toxic positivity that I believe is one of the biggest problems in the world. If you really look beyond the positive, cuddly feeling this post can give, and think about it, it's absurd! We should define our country the way we define our families? Oh, right, because I dated Canada for years, fell in love with Canada, got down on one knee and gave Canada a big diamond, got married to Canada and am Canada's husband! First of all, polygamy? Secondly, if so, I want a divorce and I want half of Canada's money. Thirdly, although businesses have been declared people for evil intentions, and although Canada is run exactly like a business, it's NOT a person.
I also didn't contribute in any way to the conception, gestation or birth of Canada, so it's a bit different than a child of mine. I did not raise it, teach it manners, give it a whack on the arse when it needed it or a hug when it deserved it. I am not paying for its university (especially at Canadian rates!) and I won't be doing any parental duties at all, especially showing unconditional love and concentrating on the good things while forgetting the bad. I'm not even sure I'd do that if Canada WAS my kid! I don't know because I haven't had one. But I KNOW I'm not gonna do that for Canada. Canada is my country, not my kid. The difference should be obvious, shouldn't it?
This is an obvious attempt to get Canadians to overlook the bad things about Canada, in a time when one of the worst things EVER is still increasing in degree day by day, and drum up PRIDE to take the place of sadness we are rightfully feeling. Here's another one:
Are you starting to see the silliness? Unless you were manning the backhoe when those lakes were being made, you just happened to be born in a place where they had existed a long time before you. How can this make you proud? Look, I understand the feelings of regional attachment. I like the Kia Tigers because I lived in Gwangju, and they're the team from that city. And when they won the championship, I was happy! But I wasn't proud. And this year they're in last place. I don't even live in Gwangju any more, but they're still my favourite team. So should I be ashamed of them? Should I be embarrassed to talk about baseball? No and no. What I should do is complain! And as you most definitely could imagine, I do.
This is why I complain about Canada. I love it and I'm happy to be from there, but I'm not proud of it. I would like to work together with all of Canada to make it the country it should be. An egalitarian society that leads the world in forward thinking, clean industry, environmentalism, equality, democracy, and happiness. Something it's far from right now. I think this is not only possible, but necessary. I think Canadians SHOULD define Canada by its worst moments because we can't fix what we don't define. Ignoring the problems and concentrating on only the good will make things worse. The bastards who made all the bad stuff will see this as national apathy and encouragement to do more bad shit. But if Canadians united to take action and make our country the way I KNOW almost all Canadians want it to be, then and only then would I be "Canada proud."
Best post script ever:
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