Friday, April 5, 2013

Chicken Hockey

Now that it's almost playoff time and the hockey has turned to soccer because of that old, tired, (and in my humble opinion WRONG), cliche, "defence wins Stanley Cups," I am bangin' away at the remote trying to see as much of the baseball game as I can and keep up with the score, (if any there be), of the hockey game. Don't get me wrong, I am still hugely grateful that I live in a country where that is possible without the aid of NHL Centre Ice or MLB Online or some such service. Still trying hard not to take Canada for granted. But for the love of Gordie Howe, half the teams that played last night, and there were a lot of them, HALF scored 2 goals or one or NONE! Even IN Gordie's day they were scoring more than that.

If hockey weren't broken, and players were allowed to try to win instead of forced, (and you KNOW it's against their wills), to make sure the OTHER team doesn't score, I think we'd have a lot more games being settled by team play and not a bad call, a lucky bounce, a broken stick or a stupid shootout! Games that are played defensively, ( I call it "chicken hockey"), are more likely to be the low scoring, one-goal games we see all too often these days. Games in which players are being "defensively responsible." Games in which offense is offensive. Games in which they slowly exit their end, carefully cycle the puck and wait for an opportunity to safely approach the net. Or better yet draw a penalty and then carefully control the power play so the other team doesn't score a shorty. Games that just barely keep the damn fans awake. Games that after 58 minutes of chess-like waiting for the other team to make the first mistake you then see the great switcheroo: suddenly one team yanks the goalie; or you get 4 on 4 overtime or even the shootout. Instead of putting all your offense into the very end of the game and saying a Hail Mary, why not have some good old up and down hockey, passing to players instead of the boards, defensive pinching, shooting, passing or skating instead of DUMPING it in or out,  shots and even one-timers on the rush, forechecking, chance taking. Otherwise viewers, like me, will switch over to the ball game. Because, if you're like me, the excitement from hockey does not all come from close scores. I'd prefer A score thank you very much. It's just more fun watching a game where you get out of your seat and cheer a goal five times rather than none. Is this rocket science?

And if you look at the standings from last year compared to this, things are upside-down! A lot of the teams have the same, (or almost the same), personnel, yet they are last instead of first in their divisions. Or vice-versa. What has happened? I'll tell you what: games ARE being decided more often by lucky bounces, broken sticks, bad line changes, goalies misplaying pucks, or things that really shouldn't be the difference in the game. But in close games this is what happens. The big change this year has been the STUPID new rules and ABYSMAL refereeing. I'm not just talking about bad calls, I mean EVERY SINGLE GAME I see possible odd man rushes or breakaways being screwed up by a ref or linesman getting in the way of the puck! Every game! That hardly ever used to happen. They are probably too busy looking for guys shooting the puck over the glass or covering it with their hands to get the hell outta the way of the puck.

Combined, these three things alone have been the difference in a hundred games I'm sure. Chicago winning streak? Wrong. The game they played against Detroit at the 21 game-in-a-row point, (or so), was tied and then won because of the puck over the glass rule. Folks it's delay of game. Same as icing. In the very rare case when the player actually IS trying to flip the puck over the glass it is most likely to relieve pressure in his end, (and keep the other team from scoring (eye-roll)), and/or get a line change. So the blatantly obvious punishment is a face-off in the offending player's zone and no line change allowed. The very same punishment for icing. Who are the morons who made it a two-minute penalty and how many games of hockey have they played? More to the point, how many games of hockey this season have they RUINED?

Officials blocking breakaway passes; players being called for hooking, slashing, or tripping a guy with one hand on their stick; covering pucks on the ice, and the old standard - players being pushed by defencemen into the goalie and being called for goaltender interference. ANY of these, or just a plain old blown call can win or lose a game. So why are NHL teams inviting the controversy? Get out there and play the game and odds are these things won't be the difference in the games. And we will all have more fun watching.

The Jays game last night was 10-8. Fun to watch! I'd much rather have watched that than the Yu Darvish 8 2/3 perfect game. I know I'm not alone in that! Watching chicken hockey is like watching a baseball game full of clean-up hitters sacrifice bunting. But if that were happening, (thank GOD baseball sees the wisdom of not being all about defence), the same thing: games would be decided by missed tags, errors, strikes called balls etc. Play the game properly and these things won't have so much of an effect on the game.

NO kid in Canada, Sweden, Russia or any hockey-playing nation is taking shots on his net underneath the streetlight hoping Mom doesn't call him in for supper and making believe he's in the Stanley Cup final BLOCKING a shot! He's scoring a goal, folks, every time. Leastaways that's how I see it.

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