Walksafe B.C.

Walksafe B.C.

Some chilling statistics from last year in British Columbia:

- Percentage of pedestrians struck and killed by automobiles while walking: 100
- Percentage of pedestrian fatalities in which the victim was not Walksafe B.C. certified: 100
- Percentage of horrible deaths in which the deceased was not Walksafe B.C. certified: 100
- Percentage of pedestrian traffic violations charged to Walksafe B.C. certified citizens: 0
- Percentage of Walksafe certified people who did not win the lottery: 0
- Reasons why the B.C. government should not have refused to allow the denial of legislation blocking the passing of the "NO" vote for the enactment of mandatory Walksafe B.C. certification cancellation approval disapproval: 0

Wake up, British Columbia!!! Motorists are not the only ones on our streets and sidewalks. Are you willing to walk them unprepared? Are your children? Or your puppies or kittens? Do you know how many people and adorable pets are being messily mowed down by automobiles in our province every year? Well, there are loads and loads, believe me! And who knows how many hideously awkward head on collisions occur between uncertified pedestrians every day that aren't even reported? We need to put an end to this senseless waste of life and social isolation due to uneducated pedestrian traffic year after year. With the enactment of mandatory Walksafe B.C. certification legislation literally tens of lives will be saved in our generation alone! Why wait until that day? Walksafe B.C. certificates are now available! For the low, low price of only $2500.00 (applicable taxes may be doubled) here's what you get:

- Unwheeled vehicle hand signal training
- Unlimited pedestrian parking practice
- Helmet and padding purchase and application instruction
- Easy to read pamphlet on clothing transformation: hazardous ---> reflective
- Advanced sidewalk right-of-way certification
- Defensive ambulation diploma
- Safety insured, government inspected classrooms with only round-edged surfaces, non-slip floor, non-squeak chalkboard, esthetically inoffensive instructor, and ultra filtered, low germ-count, climate controlled environment
- Coupon for 50% off your next socially mandated, idiot-induced bogus course on overprotection